Select Page

It’s rare for me to waste words on Rick Scott, who sits in the U.S. Senate despite his past tenure as CEO of a health care company that defrauded Medicare and Medicaid so blatantly that the Justice Department won 14 felony convictions. One might wonder how this guy has managed to rise so high, and how any state would support such a person, but we’re talking here about Florida. Which tends to look kindly on the subspecies known as Florida Man.

Earlier this week, Scott posted a video unique in the annals of senatorial rhetoric:

“Sen. Rick Scott here. Let me give you a travel warning. If you’re a socialist, communist, somebody who believes in big government, I would think twice, think twice, if you’re thinking about taking a vacation or moving to Florida. We’re the free state of Florida. We actually don’t believe in socialism…We like freedom, liberty, capitalism, things like that.”

Yes, folks, we’ve devolved to the point – the nadir – where even tourism is being politicized. You’d think it would be nuts for a Floridian to tell visitors to stay away, given the fact that visitors typically contribute more than $100 billion a year to the Florida economy and support over 1.7 million Florida jobs. But, lest we forget, Rick Scott is a loyal apparatchik of DeSantistan, with a mindset one notch below moron.

Set aside, if possible, the demagogic conflation of “socialist,” “communist,” and “big government.” Set aside, if possible, the fact that 4.8 million Floridians partake of – and are often dependent upon – the most successful big government program in American history, Social Security. If Scott really wants to police the hearts and minds of tourists, to ensure that only MAGAts swim in the Florida surf; if he really wants to cleanse “the free state of Florida” of all traces of big government; if he really wants to back up his rhetoric with action, then here’s what needs to happen:

Florida should hereby reject all the financial help it gets from the federal government. In the most recent fiscal year, Washington gave the “free state” a nice chunk of change – $37 billion.

Florida should radically rejigger its state budget, because, by rejecting all federal money, it will shrink by 33 percent.

Florida should tell the parents of schoolchildren, “Sorry, we’re stopping big government at the border, so there will no longer be federal money to support our public education. We get a few billion bucks a year from the feds, and that’s 14 percent of our public school budget, but nah, we don’t want it anymore.”

Florida should tell its low-income and disabled citizens, “I know you depend on Medicaid for your health care, but we’re making an exciting change in the program. Big government has been paying 60.9 percent of our Medicaid tab, but we’re a free state, so from now on we’re going to stop that money at the border.”

Florida should hereby end its longstanding practice of taking big government money for things like road repair. To be consistent with Scott’s rhetoric, it should reject the federal Infrastructure law’s $5.2 billion earmarked for Florida’s roads, bridges, public transit, ports, and airports. And it should give back the $8.8 billion it received from Biden’s America Rescue Plan; half of that money went to capital construction projects, but since that’s socialism, the bucks should go bye bye, right?

Florida should remove, from its state budget, the $30 million in big government money that it’s using to send bonuses ($1000 per person) to law enforcement officers, firefighters, and other first responders. If those socialist benefits have already been distributed, the recipients should give it all back.

Florida should tell the 25,000 families that get help from the Temporary Assistance for Needy Families program – which gets block grants from the Washington socialists – that henceforth those families are on their own.

Florida should hereby reject the $1.2 billion in socialist money that Biden is sending its way to expand broadband internet statewide. Because it is consistent with free state principles that millions of its citizens remain disconnected from the 21st century.

As if any of that would ever happen.

Updating some dialogue from Casablanca:

“I’m shocked, shocked!, to find that socialism is going on here!”

“Your federal winnings, sir.”

“Thank you very much!”